Frustration is setting in...

I used to laugh when I heard people say "All I want to do is talk to someone!" about calling various companies for various problems. I have never agreed more. I have spent hours online, trying to find which agency or lawyer would best fit our values, beliefs, and need. But how much can  you really get from a website? I have filled out countless contact forms, surveys about types of adoption, and tried to sort out what's what instead of having to call every single agency or lawyer in the state (which, so far I've only found SIX in the entire state). I have not heard back from a single organization. I originally thought we would go through Bethany but they don't handle foster adoptions in SC. All I want to do is find someone we can sit down with that has knowledge of all options and is able to give us some real statistics, costs, possible difficulties, and pertinent information for the next steps. Is that too much to ask?? Every agency I find only deals with one option and the lawyers are spread across the state and don't have information online to know if I'm wasting my time going that route. One website said it was more expensive to go through an agency, which didn't make a lot of sense to me. Then, if we go through foster care, do we even have to have a lawyer or agency? Do we know for sure that's what we want without getting the whole picture? I know this isn't going to be easy, I never expected it to be. But I also didn't think it would be this hard just to get the process started.

Getting Closer...

8 days from now I will be D-O-N-E with my master's degree! I can't believe I finally did it! It is kind of scary to think about all of the free time I am going to have in just over a week.
This past weekend Justin and I went to St. Augustine to attend a friend's wedding and celebrate our anniversary. We had an AMAZING time (even if the city wasn't the most entertaining in the world). It was so nice just being together with no homework/school work, no phones going off, no agenda. I try to stay positive? hopeful? sentimental? that it will be our last anniversary without a child and I always truly enjoy the time we have together.
I emailed Bethany Christian Adoptive Services this morning to set up an appointment with them. They don't deal with DSS foster care children (unless we go outside SC) but their values & mission go with ours and I feel like contacting them is a good first step. They handle a lot of domestic and international adoptions so I know they will be able to give us the big picture with all of the small details in regards to those options. Once we have that information, we'll contact another agency to discuss foster adoptions options so that we have all of the options. I'm going to schedule the appointment for as early in July as possible so we can really get the ball rolling before school starts. Between adoption and Togo, I feel like time cannot go by fast enough! I am so excited (as the tune to that song go through my head... I feel like Jessie on Saved by the Bell, you know you what episode I'm talking about!) Ok, that's my sign I need to stop writing... :)

Time goes by so fast!

This Thursday marks 4 years for Justin and I! Marrying him was the best decision I have ever made. He is my best friend and I can't wait to see what the future brings us!

Check out the shoes! I was the only one that did not know what was going on as the bridal party and congregation began giggling during the prayer. I love his sense of humor, he makes me laugh every day :)

I was not a huge fan of our cake but in the grand scheme of things, it was delicious and we ended as Mr. and Mrs.!

This is one of my favorite pics. The photographer was so excited about the way the sunlight was falling, we were slow dancing to "The Train" to get this great shot! Off to happily every after...

Faith

I was talking to a girl at Julie's house yesterday about a friend of theirs that was adopting a little girl from China. She said it took them FOUR YEARS.... I felt my heart breaking at that number. In my head all I could think was "four years?? Everyone else only has to wait 9 months! We've already waited 3 1/2 years... another four years??" Then my hand fell on my car keys. When I was in high school I went to youth program one Wednesday night with some friends and the youth pastor gave out nuts to everyone (the nuts like you put on screw to hold them in place). He told us the story about how on helicopters there is a nut at the top of the blades that holds them in place and pilots often call it the "Jesus Nut" because they have to have faith that it was put on properly and that God will keep them safe. I have kept my Jesus nut for these past 10 years and often play with it when I'm holding my keys. Yesterday, I needed that Jesus nut. It reminded me that I have to have faith that God will keep me safe- emotionally, that is. He would never give me more than I can carry. If it is in His plan to make it take four years, then it will and He will help me walk those years with Justin. At this point, all we can do is have faith...